I'm Still Here

Wow... Over a year since my last post...

Well, that school year that was about to start the last time I posted anything was the worst one I've ever experienced which is why I didn't post much. There's nothing smart about posting job woes online, in the public sphere where ANYONE, including a boss, could see it.

So I feel like all there is to say is that it was horrible, I resigned mid-March, but I finished the year. For those that knew what was going on, they could agree that it was a feat, for sure.

Let's fast-forward the story to the present. The wonderful, sweet, providential present...

My career has taken a detour from where I thought it was going. I had been teaching middle school choir for several years, loving choir, loving middle school. So when I resigned my middle school job, I set out looking for another secondary choir position. Strangely, the only interviews I was called for were three high school jobs and one elementary music job. No middle schools.

Anyway, the summer dragged on and I didn't have a job. It was quite stressful.

As if that wasn't enough, In April, we had decided to move. Not just move, build a house. We signed papers for building a new house on May 4th. This move was/is a big move up. Nicer neighborhood, nicer house, hopefully nicer neighbors who don't let their dogs bark all night long driving my husband crazy. My income previously had not been essential to our family making ends meet, but soon it would be. No pressure. I needed a job.

The housing market in our area was red hot last May, and our house sold before we were even formally listed on the market. We sold our house and had not yet broken ground on the next house, and were in need of interim housing. We ended up moving in June to a 3rd floor apartment. The apartment life was quite peaceful compared to the stress of the aforementioned neighbor and dogs. The worst part was that we had to walk Daisy down three flights every time she needed to do her business. At least that was a task we could happily assign to the kids. The summer was spent anxiously waiting for my phone to ring while the kids swam at the apartment pool.

The job I now have is unbelievably good. Good for my family, good for my sanity, and good for my life.

When you have a boss like I had last year who tells you that everything is your fault, it disintegrates your sense of truth. Prior to that job, I had encouraging bosses who brought out the best in me, motivated me to give my all. By the end of last year, my goal was to get through each day without being called in to my boss's office. When I did my best to make my students work hard, that's when there was conflict with them which landed me in "trouble". When I would let them get away with not working, when I expected less from my students, that's when my boss would leave me alone. I eventually learned to fly below the radar. But that's just not my style. I felt dirty inside knowing I wasn't doing a good job when I approached it that way. I was starting to believe that up was down and down was up. All in all, it was not a good fit, and I had to leave. My sanity required it.

So now I am back to teaching at two schools, but they are elementary schools, and I get to stay at one school for a whole week, and then the next week go to the other school. It's much less stressful than what I had done for three years, mornings here and afternoons there. My one year being a full time teacher at one school was a complete disaster, and I'm more than grateful to be split again.

Here's the kicker. One of the schools where I now teach is where my kids go. AND my mom works there. Not only does she work there, she's the other music teacher on campus. I work WITH my mom. We plan together. We sometimes teach together. It's really quite amazing. She's been at this school since it opened in 1992, and she's a fabulous teacher. I know have so much to learn from her. She's my ultimate mentor in so many ways. And I know that no matter what, there's someone on campus who will go to bat for me, protect me any way she can, and help me be my best. She'll let me know what I need to know. It's comfortable. It's so very good.

My other school doesn't have the family ties, but there are wonderful folks over there who make the job a joy. My mom's counterpart at that school is like my other work "mom". (She even has a daughter nearly exactly my age, 6 days younger than me.) We get along very well, and have a great time teaching next door to each other. It has surprised us both how comfortable our working relationship has been. We have fallen into a natural rhythm of helping each other, checking on each other. It's a good thing, too, because we share a portable building. We're like suite-mates. She tells me all the time how much she misses me when I'm not at her school.

This school year is over half-way over. I can say definitively that I am valued at my job. My bosses support me and want to help me to do the best job I can. When I hold students accountable, they back me. Up is up again, and it feels good. It is good for my psyche.

I have much more to post, but I think that's enough for now.

The song in my head is a jingle... and it's terrible, so I'll spare you...

The Eve of School

We're on the cusp of big things... School is about to start. Tonight was "Back to School Night" for one of my girls, and tomorrow night is the other. This is the last year we go to two of these nights for our girls at this elementary school. Next year they're both on the same night, and then after that I'm sending my Big Girl on to... *gulp*... middle school.

I'm just not ready for this girl to be growing up so much. This year, for her school shoes, I had to shop for her in the women's department.

Anyway, today both of the girls got phone calls from their homeroom teachers. It's one of those exciting things... Who will it be?? I'm very pleased with both of the teachers they were placed with. It's going to be a good year.

I've got my classroom ready. I've been at work for about 2 weeks already, with new teacher orientation and meetings and such, plus the regular days all teachers have to do. I'm just about ready to start planning and getting things ready for students to come next week. Next week... It's so close. I'm ready to meet students, and teach choir. I'm tired of the training sessions about entering purchase orders and boring stuff like that. It's important stuff (mostly), but those sessions are so BORING.

I have been exhausted this week, and last, now that I mention it. I've been putting in long hours at the top of a ladder to get things up on the walls in my very tall classroom. Every day that I've been at school without my girls, I've been working at least 2 or 3 hours longer than I had to just so that the days when I did have to bring the girls with me, I'd be able to leave at a reasonable time. When I finally get home, I've been completely useless. Hubby has stepped up quite a bit, and that helps.

I look forward to when "real life" starts. My new job means that there will be a new normal around here, and I wonder how that will work out. I have a longer commute, and longer hours. Who knows how it will go? I guess we find out next week.

I just love the rhythm of the school year... It helps me so much to always have things to look forward to. At the beginning, it's exciting, and everyone is positive. We have holidays, and weird days off here and there to mark interim goals. And then the end... It's so fun towards the end. Everyone is ready for things to be over, and looking toward the summer. It's a good life. There's lots of positive perspective. It's good for me.

As I work in my room, I've been listening to music, playing my iPod on speakers. At various points over the last two weeks, I have had a myriad of songs in my head, and right now, I can't think of a single one... I'm such a failure of a blogger. *Shrug* Oh well...

Big Changes

Seems like there are many changes taking place for our family this summer.

We're on the church search. I have previously blogged a little about some conflict with the church we had been attending. And I really don't want to dwell on that anymore. It's time to find the place we are supposed to serve and worship for the next ten years at least. I don't want to be making another change in a year or two. This is getting old already.

I have a new job lined up for the fall, teaching middle school choir at ONE SCHOOL (Hallelujah!!) for a different school district. I haven't blogged about that at all for obvious reasons. I would hate to say something online that costs me a job opportunity. Knowing me and my big mouth (fingers?), it's likely for me to say (type) something I shouldn't. Getting a job at one school has been a dream of mine for three years. I get to start and end the day in the same place. I get to have all my teaching materials in one place. I get to apply my philosophy exclusively in a choir program that I will not share with another teacher. Let's see if I really know my stuff or what...

Big girl is growing up. She'll be starting the 4th grade in the fall, and that's the year when they start talking about body changes. So in order to beat anyone else to it, she and I have been reading "The Care and Keeping of You," an American Girl book about maturation. She'll be 10 in October, and there are already some changes taking place. She's so much more emotional about EVERYTHING than she has ever been. Her hormones are starting to make her in to a crazy person. I had always heard that would happen. I was hoping my sweet girl would somehow be spared this awful transformation. But she does want to be a mother some day, so I suppose this is required in order for that to happen.

Now that the girls are both getting a little more grown up, we've introduced them to some of our humor. Hubby had the girls watch UHF and I showed them The Princess Bride. Now when Hubby and I start quoting those movies, the whole family is in on it. Dinner has been more fun since they've seen the "Wheel of Fish" and "Raul's Wild Kingdom." We were at the pediatrician's office recently (Little Girl had bronchitis), and the girls were in the little room yelling, "You so stupid!" and making each other laugh. I had to make them stop because other mommies and kids were within earshot and obviously that's not appropriate for a toddler to say. It wouldn't be appropriate for my kids to say in any context other than what it was, quoting the movie. They weren't actually calling each other stupid.

Little girl had bronchitis after we sent her with her grandparents to Disney World with a cough. The trip had been planned for months. We weren't going to not let her go because of a cough. We actually stopped at Walgreen's on the way to the airport to pick up cough medicine (we had given her the last of what we had at home) and some kid's acetaminophen. Then the day they came back, I picked everyone up at the airport, took my parents to their house, and then took Little girl to the doctor on the way home. Poor kid. She's fine now, not even coughing anymore.

Hubby and I have changed. From October to April I lost about 25 lbs. I've had to buy new everything since nothing I had fit except socks and shoes. Hubby is closing in on 40 lbs and he's having to shop too. It's really great. I like the new me better than the old me. I will keep using Lose It! possibly forever. It's working and I don't see a reason to stop. It makes me think about what I eat and make better choices.

So those are the big things... Maybe I'll blog a few more times before school starts and I fall off again. I'm really the worst blogger ever.

What happened to April??

So if you follow this blog, I owe you a serious apology. The six of you must be the most patient readers on the planet because you don't get much from me... Like April...

So in April, I had the best possible thing happen at work. I took my tiny little choir to contest, and they got the best score they could possibly get!! It was so wonderful. I cried with my students as I told them their scores. I have some pictures, but it would be against the law to publish them without the consent of parents.

There have been other interesting things going on that I can't put out there on the interwebs, at least not yet...

My darling husband and I have purchased non-refundable plane tickets to Europe for a summer vacation. We'll be visiting some long-time friends and taking side trips from Germany to Austria, and maybe Switzerland... I know, you feel sorry for me already. It will be tough, but somebody's got to go, and this time it's us. ;o)

The kids are growing and doing more all the time. We have recently begun letting them walk to school together without an adult. We live a few blocks away from the school, so it's not like it's all that far, and there's a crossing guard stationed at the only questionable crosswalk they encounter. It actually makes things easier on us grown-ups to not have to brave the school car traffic, and the kids love the independence. It's a good thing.

My little one seems to be in a better place than ever. She is taking her ADHD medication regularly, and is generally much happier about life. She seems to get frustrated less often, and she's able to complete her school work much more than before.

I have been on a diet since October 19, 2011, and late last month I reached my goal weight!! That has been super fun! I get to add 500 calories per day back into my daily intake, and it feels like a feast! I like the way I look in clothes (size 4 pants!!), and I feel better about myself generally. I don't ever want to fit into all those clothes I took out of my closet ever again. I know it's better for my bad knee to carry 24 pounds less than it was carrying before. Now to keep it off...

Hubby is also losing weight, and he's doing great. I think we're in a better place together than we've ever been.

Life isn't perfect, but it's good, VERY good! Thanks for hanging in there with me.

This is one of our contest pieces that has been in my head for weeks. Catchy, ain't it? (We did the 2-part treble arrangement.)

My Nephew

I have a brand new nephew! My brother and his wife are the proud parents of a beautiful baby boy! I got to meet him over the weekend. He and I got along famously! His mother would nurse him, and then pass him to me, and I'd get him to burp and keep him awake for a few minutes before wrapping him up and getting him to fall asleep. It was so fun! I just love tiny babies so much!

Spring Break

Here it is, the very last day that feels like Spring Break. (In my opinion, Sunday doesn't count, because Sunday feels like Sunday, and not Spring Break, even though school doesn't start again until Monday.) This is also St. Patrick's Day.

Yesterday, my Little Girl and I went out to celebrate her birthday. We started the day with manicures & pedicures at a local nail salon, then had lunch out, saw "The Lorax" in 3D, and then went shopping for a new outfit for her. (She got to pick the outfit, so I could be sure to have at least one thing I could count on not fighting her to wear on a Sunday morning.) We were out from 10 AM to 3 PM. She's seven years old now, growing up fast.

Her birthday is always hard for parties. Being that it's over Spring Break every year, we can't have a party on the weekend before or after because that's a part of Spring Break, and people are gone. We usually do something, so memories are made, and of course we make a huge fuss over her, so she feels special. Last year all four of us went to pick out Daisy, our dog, on her birthday and went to Sea World the next day. This year it was a real girl's day out for just the two of us. It was her first professional mani/pedi, her first 3D movie, and her first time to go shopping for clothes where she had all that freedom to make choices. It was an expensive day with a kid, but we didn't throw a party, so it all works out.

Other than yesterday, Little Girl's big day, I was basically useless for the whole week. I didn't get out of the house at all for three days (not consecutively, thank God). I realize any time I have more than a day or two off that I really need to work. At times I feel like work takes me away from my family too much, but then days like I've had this week remind me how good it is to get out of the house with a purpose. As much fun as it would be at first to have a life of days like yesterday, I would quickly grow tired of going out and spending money like that, not to mention that I'd run out of money! I need to be useful. I'm not all that good at making myself useful on my own.

I needed the rest this week, for sure. Glad to have had it. Now back to work on Monday!

Weight Loss

One of the big things going on in my life for the last 4 and a half months (since October 19, 2011 to be exact) is Lose It! I have officially lost just over 15 lbs by tracking what I eat. It's the first time in my life that I have really dieted, and I've had success! I am not to my goal yet, but I have shrunk by 2 or 3 pant sizes, depending on the brand. My face is thinner and even acquaintances are noticing (and commenting) that I look like I've lost weight.

I think that part of why this is working for me is that I can still eat anything I want. I just have to log it. If I were to put myself on a no-whatever diet, I think I'd be obsessing about eating whatever was off limits. I would cheat, blow it, and then quit. I don't want to lose heart like that.

Back when I was 15 lbs heavier, I could eat about 1650 per day (200 more calories than I can now), and still lose a pound a week. Now that I'm only allowed 1446 per day, it's getting harder. Especially when they have a hamburger cook-out for the staff at work, or when it's birthday cake time. Yesterday was a family reunion with all kids of very good food, and I ate way too much of it. I went nearly 900 calories over my budget! Today I'm very aware that I can't go over, and I'm hungry. I only have 327 calories left for the day, and I want to eat some more cupcakes, and some crackers... but I know I can't. If I hadn't just blown it yesterday, I'd probably go for about 500 calories more for today, and be over by a little.

I know that after I am done baring my soul here, I'll go get some soup, and eat that for 160 calories in the entire can. I know I can afford that. Blogging increases my accountability.

So hungry....